Nica set the body on fire before she and her friends nonchalantly walked into Shoney's for a breakfast buffet.

This did slow Albert down a touch. It's hard to adjust to a new body. Walking's always a bitch.

Humans could never have been intended to walk. They certainly aren't designed for it. The center of balance is up in the chest, close to their ridiculously heavy skulls. The feet are too narrow, the inner ear too dull, the ankles impossibly fragile. Albert felt a tickle in his human nose, tried to brace himself, then sneezed and fell over on his ass.

Losing the old body was just an inconvenience. But a hell of an inconvenience nonetheless.

Reattaching neurons and learning to walk was hard enough in a human body - and why they had to insist on inefficient human bodies, Albert couldn't comprehend - but it was even harder when you inherited one with more obvious injuries. This one had a grand total of seven toes and a malfunctioning artificial knee.

"I am the great and mighty monster come to take your soul!" he bellowed. What a joke.

He started laughing, and fell over again.




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